A Little Venting

I am beginning to wonder how much more of all of this I can take and that this will never end! Days go by when I can visualize getting a call from AFFA saying we can travel to pick up our babies and then there are those days when everything seems hopeless.
Hearing nothing and being told 'soon' 4 months ago tends to wear on a person. You'd think the 50% of children dying the streets would be enough motivation to want to get bills passed and dossier's done as quickly as possible so you can move children out to be able to help more. The longer they wait the more children suffer. Do they not care?
Not to mention the emotional effect this is having on the children who have been waiting for 2 years to come home! If it is this hard for me as an adult waiting for 1 year, I can't imagine the emotional stress a child would go through for waiting for 2 years! Is this just another 'disappointment' in their eyes? Do they feel unwanted? or do they understand govermental laws and why their moms and dads can't come and get them? Do they feel abandoned for the second time? Why doesn't the government of Liberia get moving and fix this problem? How long will God make us wait?
Driving in the car the other day, Colten started talking about Onah and Marie coming home. He said, "well, I ask God to bring them home, but He won't let them!" Sadly, my vision is blurry so much of the time through this whole process that I often times feel that same way. I feel like I've gone on this journey with God and he stopped walking. I'm finding it hard to find my hope again these days. And it gets frustrating because I want that hope so badly but can't find it.
Boy, this was a really 'Debby Downer' post, but had to get it off my chest.
Praying for good news soon!

Little News...

We did hear a little news today, not very promising, but it was something. Liberia did pass the adoption bill. It is now waiting for the senate to pass it and then the president will review it and she will have to approve it. So that's where we are.
Our agency said the bill is very vague and confusing. The 4 month clause that we were worried about is part of that vague part. It states that the adopted child will need to stay in 'foster care' for 4 months. We don't know if the foster care at the AFAA house will be good enough for them or if they have to be in the foster care of the adoptive parents for 4 months. AFAA is a licensed foster care home in Liberia. Also if it is the 4 month foster care with parents we don't know if that 4 months will be allowed in the US or have to be a stay in Liberia. Lots of unanswered questions, but the bill is moving.
About a time frame, really no clue. I couldn't understand what time frame she tried to give us. It was very confusing. The goveernment is going through and basically re-doing all the case studies and work on all the children, even if it was done previously, because they want to make sure it was done correctly. So it will take a while unless they change their 'work ethic', which I doubt :).
I keep praying God will hear me say "Uncle" and just pick up those papers and put them in front of the right people and get our babies home. Yesterday was a hard day for Colten and I. He is at that age where he understands time more. He understands and always reminds me that next year is his birthday and what time bible study is. He wants to know when things are happening.
Yesterday he had a rough day and was being very disobediant, after a few fits he asked to call Matt and talk to him. So we called and Matt was busy and didn't answer his cell. Colten had a major melt down. I pulled him over to me and held him for awhile. When I asked him what was wrong he just continued crying. Finally after a few minutes he said, "I'm just sad cause I want Onah and Marie to come home."
I know he's reminded of them alot. Just yesterday we were in Wal-Mart shopping and this little african american boy about Onah's size came up to Colten and was checking out his car he had with him. The little boy kept trying to talk to Colten, you couldn't understand him, and take his car. As he walked away Colten said, "mommy, that looked like Onah. I bet Onah will want to take me car too." I know God's teaching him through all this too, but I don't like to see him hurt like me in this.
So, I ask that you continue to pray for our journey, and that the babies will come home soon (we're shooting for August...Marie's birthday) and that God would give me guidance on how to help Colten better understand and that he would help ease his homesickness from his brother and sister.
Thanks for reading. As always I will keep you all posted...

Got a Little Fix

Onah 13 mo. old.


Marie 8 months old.

Well, after not hearing anything from a long time, it was nice to get an email with some pictures of our babies! We still have no new word on anything, but at least we can gain some strength to go on and on with these adorable pictures!
The AFAA orphanage must have taken them and sent them via email to Cheryl. As soon as I saw them I cried and cried. Colten didn't really understand what was wrong. I told him that I just miss them cause they are so far away. Then he said, "Oh, like you cried when you were in Liberia and missed me?" Then I think he could understand.
Onah is walking now according to the pictures. He has slimmed down from the chunky boy we saw in February. He is so handsome though! My little prince!
Marie doesn't look like she has changed much. She's still my sweet little girl.
I really was hoping that I would get to see some of the milestones like their first steps, so that hurt a little, but I'm happy for him cause now he has the ability to get out on his own. Before he was dependant on the AFAA workers to get him out of his crib, now he can move around on his own. I don't think they go through a crawling phase in Liberia cause they can't put them on the ground. So they must go straight from crib to walking :)
I'm praying that I get to see Marie's first steps. Last word was that the president was back in the country and supposed to be working out adoption stuff, but you never know how long that will take in Liberia. The WACSN agency that was shut down by the government filed a law suit against the GOL (gov. of Liberia) so their time has been consumed with that alot, and I think I heard WACSN won? Don't know how you do that??? Anyway, I'm praying the ban is lifted soon!!! I miss my babies so much and understand what LONGING is now. I long for them to come home! Hope you like the pics :)